Separation and divorce are extremely trying experiences. They put you under a huge amount of pressure and your emotions only make it harder to keep a clear head when you face some very important decisions.
Many people who find themselves in this situation push for taking their case to court as the pain they are feeling pushes them to seek retribution from their partner. In this situation, taking drastic legal actions may seem like the best way to punish the ‘guilty’ party.
However, bringing a court case against your soon to be ex-partner might make the situation worse. You should never forget that any decision passed on by the judge is final and disputing it will require a large amount of money and time as you will need to go to court again. In many cases, this may not even be possible.
The judgment you are presented with if you decide to take your case to the court of law may be completely different from what you and your spouse expected. Quite often, the decision of the judge is equally unfavourable for both partners, but it cannot be argued.
Mediation as the best solution in emotionally-charged cases
In essence, mediation is settling your arguments out of court with the help of professional legal counsellors. People often see it as a ‘soft’ option, so they tend to avoid it in the cases where emotions run high, for example the situations where abuse or infidelity are involved.
However, even in these circumstances mediation can be your best solution as it provides you with some modicum of control over the final result. ‘Telling your story’ might be important in your eyes, and this story will definitely be heard and considered if you opt for mediation.
A judge, on the other hand, is concerned only with facts that can be proved with hard evidence. Therefore, you are unlikely to get the harsh retribution you seek without some rock-solid proof to back up your claims. Be sure to do some prior research in order to understand what exactly constitutes as ‘proof’ in the situation like yours.
Another important benefit of mediation is the fact that it allows you to limit your children’s involvement in the case. There can be no doubt that court will be an extremely stressful experience for any child and will compound to the trauma of the parents’ divorce.
All in all, mediation is almost always preferable to court in the matters of divorce and separation. Even if the situation is complex, you have a better chance of resolving it in your favour without putting all your hopes in the hands of an impartial judge.